How many people do you meet that say “I’ll call you tomorrow,” or “sure I’ll go to your event”…and you never see them or hear from them? I realize many people will give their word to others just because they think it is what the other person wants to hear.  Unfortunately, when someone doesn’t follow through with their promise, it makes their word worthless–and as Scarface says “All I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don’t break them for no one.”

Despite Scarface’s other obvious short comings like a blinding temper, sick obsessing with his sister, and extreme chemical addiction, his view on keeping his word is golden.

If you were to go throughout your day and count the amount of times someone gives you their word and didn’t follow through, you would be surprised at how common it is (I’ve done this)…but if you are reading this, then I assume you don’t want to be common.

Here’s a key to building a power team to assist you in your missions: only depend on and keep close to you those that keep their word.  Flaky people are a dime a dozen and will let you down.  You CANNOT trust them, and relying on them will cost you dearly.

Guard your word like you word like you guard your wallet.  Lead by example no matter what the cost–if you can’t follow through (we’ve all fucked up and over-committed before), at least make a call, but don’t just leave the other person hanging.  Always follow through on what you say you are going to do–it will make you FAR more effective and differentiate  you from the pieces of shit walking around promising the world and delivering nothing.

We’ve all got a story–a reason or excuse for why we aren’t doing what would love to do.

Videos like these are good reminders to focus on the gifts, talents, and abilities you do have and to be grateful.

Still clinging on to that excuse? Time to let it go…

Note: I realize making gender based generalization can be considered sexist and in some cases assuming, however, it is worthy to note that no demographic is 100% true to stereotypes and outliers certainly do exist.

I’m sure you’ve seen the book “Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus.” There is a reason that book withstood the test of time and sold billions of copies: there is a lot of truth to the title.  For the longest time, I thought that women assessed things like I did… I really did.  I thought that a women went through the same mental processes when contemplating a mate.  Surely they did the same logical assessments as me!

I can’t tell you the exact moment that I realized this assumption was completely false, but I can tell you that it felt like walking into the bright summer day from a pitch black room.

This distinction is a HUGE key to massive success with women.

Put simply, their brains are not wired like mens.  She is, first and foremost, an EMOTIONAL creature.  You, the male reader, are first and foremost a LOGICAL being.

Men are stupid and try to court and convince women into bed by following a logical path.  For example, “If I buy this women dinner and gifts, then she will sleep with me.”  Notice the “if, then” statement.  This is a sure sign of logic.

I can’t take credit for this, but I read once that you have to change her mood, not her mind.  This is golden advice.

When she says “I don’t want to have sex, I’m too tired,” your natural response is likely to give her compelling logical reasons why she would want to have sex and why she isn’t as tired as she thinks.  However, this is not the best course of action.

Whenever you hit resistance on the road to getting laid, going logical is only going to fuck you up.  Your goal is to get her FEELING different, or in other words, changing her state.  What can you do that makes her feel horny? Is there a certain song or type of music to which she likes to dance sexy? What about the way you are touching her?

Look guy, turn off your logical brain, and start paying attention to how she is feeling.  Her mood is what is going to determine what happens.

If someone were to follow you around with a hidden camera all day, would the footage be entertaining to anyone besides your mom? I’m going to go out on a limb and say NO! The reason I make this assumption is because most people are bored.  If you are bored, then chances are your life is boring.

So why are you bored, and why is your life boring? It’s pretty simple, really.  You are living inside invisible constraints placed upon you by parental expectations, societal norms, and social conditioning.  You think  only a certain number of potential outcomes are possible.  You are stifled, living in fear, and are a slave and coward.

This reality couldn’t be further from the truth.  Somewhere along the way you became brainwashed by TV, media, and billboards of photo-shopped people to believe things (reality) works a certain way, when in fact it works just the opposite.  Celebrities are simply people more visible than you (think about that for a second)…the flip side is, the higher your ass is on the totem pole, the more shots people are going to take at you (think Brittney Spears).

You can be, do, or have anything.  The key is for the vision of your life to come from YOU, and not from something external.

I say all this to get to my point: you will be infinitely more interesting than 99% of the population when you unplug and begin on your own path.  It’s scary to be a trail blazer, sure, but the rewards far outweigh the boring alternative.

People will begin to follow you.  You will be what is interesting.  Everything you do, wear, think, etc. will be contemplated by others because you are thinking for yourself and you aren’t like the majority: wandering around looking for somewhere to plug their umbilical cords.

People just want to have fun.  They want to be where the action is…They want whats hot.  Realize, you have EVERYTHING it takes to be this type of person, but it starts with courageousness.  Take the first step and don’t look back.

One day in the near future, you will look up and will be getting laid more on accident than most guys are on purpose and it will be because you are self-actualized, happy, and most importantly FREE.  You’ll also probably realize that there is a lot more to life than hot chicks, although admittedly they are a fun distraction.

There are no rules.  There are no limits.  The voice inside your head is just a voice inside your head.  You have the power.  Everyday you are getting closer to death,  you will have a lot of time to sit around in a coffin then.  In the meantime, be busy doing what you love.  Find what turns you on.  Find what inspires you and gets you really fucking excited to get up in the morning.

You will know when you are on the right course because you will be happy without reason.  Life becomes effortless.

When looking back in 2008, it is easy to look at where I went wrong and focus on the negative.  However, by taking those ‘failures’ and repositioning them as lessons learned, I am able to grow from the experiences.  That’s not to say 2008 was bad…I am grateful for the things I did accomplish and the personal growth that took place.

1.  You Are Who You Think You Are.

Too many people let their social environment tell them their identity.  They then let this identity dictate several areas of their life.  The truth is, it is YOU who determines the altitude of your life.  Your inner voice is controlled by you.  The things you want to accomplish are up to you.  You are ultimately responsible for the events in your life.

Lester Levenson, the genius behind the Release Technique, says that “we are always demonstrating (i.e. manifesting reality). To grow, we must take full responsibility for what we demonstrate.”

What are you demonstrating in your world? Maybe it time to change your thoughts and thereby change your whole world.

2. Surround Yourself With the Type of People You Wish to Be Like.

The old quote “if you run with the skunks, you will smell like them” is definitely true.  Even someone conscious of the effects of social conformity is still subject to the beliefs, thoughts, and frame of mind of their peer group.  If you are hanging around people who do not share your ambitions, then you will find it very tough to succeed in your endevors.  Surround yourself and model the people who are as you’d like to become.

3. Stop Playing Copycat.

I realize that the previous paragraph says to model people who have accomplished what you want to accomplish, and this may seem paradoxical…well in a way it is.  It is essential to model habits and thinking patterns of successful people, but you’ve got to be creating and innovating your endeavors as well.  A genius is defined as someone who thinks in new directions.  Find successful framework, but create your spin on it.

Look at celebrities.  Many are in the publics eye simply because they are in someway unique.  You aren’t going to get to the top being generic and always playing it safe.  Face it, being generic is boring.  Who wants to live like that anyway?

4. Do What Excites You.

Too many people hear their alarm clock go off at 6 AM and dread another day of work.  They drive in rush hour traffic for an hour to a job they hate.  This is no way to live.  That said, I admire people who sacrifice and defer gratification for the well fare of their family and to be responsible citizens.  However, so many people underestimate themselves and do things because they feel like they should.

Do you have a river of interest? How could you serve your fellow man in that interest and thereby reap a harvest for your work?

Earl Nightingale once said “A person without a goal or destination is like a ship without a rudder…” Now I realize I’ve probably quoted this before and you’ve probably heard that quote 1,000 times, but I want to reveal a distinction that was a huge shift in thinking for me.

Obviously, if you want to get somewhere, you need to know where you are going.  I’ve always had goals for myself and my business, but recently I discovered I was missing something even more vital: my mission.  Your mission is like the conglomeration of all your goals rolled up into one.  It is also like your ‘ultimate’ destination.

It helps to first identify your values.  Examine your current goals and see what themes run throughout.  Often times, its a little below the surface.  Ask yourself why you would set goals of that nature.  What do you enjoy about it? What do you get out of it.

Once I wrote out my mission, all of smaller more immediate goals begin to shrink.  Everything went into proper perspective.

My daily todo list? Miniscule.

Now that I know the final destination,  I the ship’s captain, can command the ship to go “full speed ahead.”

Full Speed Ahead!

How many times have you had a great idea, only to see someone else reap fame and fortune with your idea? This recently happened to me, and its a painful reminder of how important it is to take action. I had this idea for a book that blended working out with picking up chicks, since a lot of guy who are into ‘pick up’ are skinny and nerdy.  Here is the book that I wrote, but didn’t publish…and now this guy is laughing all the way to bank, while I reap no rewards.  I’m not saying he copied me, but if I trusted my instinct and took action, I would be earning royalties right now.

Its easy to discount your ideas, simply because they’re your ideas.  It is also easy to assume other people are smarter or more capable in some way and therefore its possible to see them succeeding, but not you.  Why not have success, fame, and money? The act of sitting on your ass watching other people live their dream is spectator-ism, and its a shitty way to go through life.

The point I want to stress is trusting your instinct.  Trusting the voice inside that tells you the perfect thing to do.  It’s when you don’t listen to your instinct that you fuck things up.  Everyone has a story or experience of not listening to their gut and then regretting it later.  This is definitely true when it comes to dealing with women.  Unfortunately, I can think of several times my instinct said to go for it, and my mind came up with excuses or arguments.  Then I would find out a year later that the girl I talked myself out of, was into me.  I knew it internally all the time…I just didn’t trust that instinct.

Another example is talking to strangers.  A lot of times, I will get a feeling that I need to speak to someone.  Usually when I do, they have the answer to something I’ve been seeking.

The best way I can define instinct is it’s the voice inside that is an exact quick-to-the-surface answer, but also something of a feeling.  Like you feel you should talk to this person, or take this action.

Your mind is going to be a more logical voice, and if there is a feeling associated with it, it is likely to be fear based.  Instinct is the right answer at the right time.

What idea is your instinct pointing you toward? Maybe its time to take action in that direction.  Trust your instinct-live in the moment and take it as it comes.

You are on the train tracks and the freight train is coming.  You don’t know exactly when, but its on the way, it is only a matter of time.

its only a matter of time

It’s easy to get caught up in the everyday routine of life.  In fact, most people are experiencing life like sleepwalkers.

I’m definitely guilty of taking life for granted…but you know what? There is no guarantee for any time in the future.

What would you do if you only had 6 months to live? Personally, I’d be a lot more adventurous and would get things done with a sense of urgency.  I would jump out of bed ready to savor every delicious bite of life I had left.

Regardless, you are also getting old.  You are losing your sharpness.  You are going to wake up one day and have hair growing out of your ears and a dick that can’t get hard.

So why are you settling for mediocrity now?

Do the things you really want to do.  Never settle.  Never give up.  Go and live while you still can.  Stop taking the day for granted.  Live with a sense of urgency. Take it as it comes.  Live today.

Do it NOW!

No, this post isn’t about the classic novel by Charles Dickens, but rather about YOU.

Earl Nightingale states in his class audio program Lead the Field that “our outlook on life is like a paintbrush, and with it, we paint our world.”  What is your outlook? Have you ever wondered why some people make millions of dollars per year, and have success after success, and why others go from failure to failure?

People get what they expect out of life.  It starts in your head.  Have you ever realized that you are constantly broadcasting to others around you how to treat you?  Your subtle non-verbal cues and energy are communicating what you expect.  When you walk into a room, do you expect people to be friendly to you, or do you expect them to ignore you or be rude to you?  Your expectation determines everything.

You’ve got to rise above your social conditioning and be present like you were when you were a happy baby.  As ridiculous at it may seem, often times the things holding us back are related to some minor event that happened in childhood.  The good news is: its not real! The socially conditioned constraints in your mind can be overcome.  They are not the same as gravity.

Realize: You have the ability to set the thermostat for your life.  You are not your past.  Should you not be successful or have the courage to do what you want because your dad beat your ass as a child? Should you be fearful of living in sexual abundance because some girl turned you down in middle school?

Establish self fulfilling prophesies that will get you what you want.  Let go of your past and of the social constructs that don’t even exist!

You get what you expect out of life.  Great expectation = great results.

So while I did have a fun night out, its hard to say how much attraction the pheromones caused.  I went to a cocktail party downtown for about an hour and a half.  The most notable quote from the evening was from the waitress who told me “every woman here is talking about you.”  Alright…definitely a good sign.  However, at the end of the day, I stand by my original hypothesis that it all starts in your head.  If you expect to do better with a ‘magic potion,’ then you will.  Its a self fulfilling prophesy.

In any case, it definitely didn’t hurt anything.  I had several women laughing at my jokes and hugging on me through out the night- but then again that’s how it is every day.  Nothing crazy happened like an orgy.